Ben Bova - Acts of God.pdf

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ACTS OF GOD
Ben Bova
Who else but Sam Gunn would sue the Pope?
I'd known Sam since we were both astronauts with
NASA, riding the old shuttle to the original Mac Dae
Shack—but sue the Pope? That's Sam.
At first I thought it was a joke, or at least a
grandstand stunt. Then I began to figure that it was just
the latest of Sam's ploys to avoid marrying me. I'd been
chasing him for years, subtly at first, but once I'd retired
from the Senate, quite openly.
It got to be a game that we both enjoyed. At least, I
did. It was fun to see the panicky look on Sam's Huck
Finn face when I would bring up the subject of marriage.
"Aw, come on, Jill," he would say. "I'd make a lousy
husband. I like women too much to marry one of 'em."
I would smile my most sphinxlike smile and softly
reply, "You're not getting any younger, Sam. You need a
good woman to look after you."
And he'd arrange to disappear. I swear, his first
expedition out to the asteroid belt was as much to get
away from me as to find asteroids for mining. He came
close to getting himself killed then, but he created the
 
new industry of asteroid mining—and just about wiped
out the metals and minerals markets in most of the
resource-exporting nations on Earth. That didn't win him
any friends, especially among the governments of those
nations and the multinational corporations that fed off
them.
I still had connections into the Senate Intelligence
Committee in those days, and I knew that at least three
southern hemisphere nations had put out contracts on
Sam's life. To say nothing of the big multinationals. It was
my warnings that saved his scrawny little neck.
Sam lost the fortune he made on asteroid mining, of
course. He'd made and lost fortunes before that, it was
nothing new to him. He just went into other business
lines; you couldn't keep him down for long.
He was running a space freight operation when he
sued the Pope. And the little sonofagun knew that I'd be
on the International Court of Justice panel that heard his
suit.
"Senator Meyers, may I have a word with you?" My
Swedish secretary looked very upset. He was always very
formal, always addressed me by my old honorific, the
way a governor of a state would be called “Governor''
even if he's long retired or in jail or whatever.
"What's the matter, Hendrick?" I asked him.
Hendrick was in his office in The Hague, where the
World Court is headquartered. I was alone in my house in
Nashua, sipping at a cup of hot chocolate and watching
 
the winter's first snow sifting through the big old maples
on my front lawn, thinking that we were going to have a
white Christmas despite the greenhouse warming. Until
Hendrick's call came through, that is. Then I had to look
at his distressed face on my wall display screen.
"We have a very unusual... situation here," said
Hendrick, struggling to keep himself calm. "The chief
magistrate has asked me to call you."
From the look on Hendrick's face, I thought
somebody must be threatening to unleash nuclear war, at
least.
"A certain .. . person," Hendrick said, with
conspicuous distaste, "has entered a suit against the
Vatican."
"The Vatican!" I nearly dropped my hot chocolate.
"What's the basis of the suit? Who's entering it?"
"The basis is apparently over some insurance claims.
The litigant is an American citizen acting on behalf of the
nation of Ecuador. His name is"—Hendrick looked down
to read from a document that I could not see on the
screen—"Samuel S. Gunn, Esquire."
"Sam Gunn?" I did drop the cup; hot chocolate all
over my white corduroy slacks and the hooked rug my
great-grandmother had made with her very own arthritic
fingers.
 
Sam was operating out of Ecuador in those days.
Had himself a handsome suite of offices in the
presidential palace, no less. I drove through the slippery
snow to Boston and took the first Clipper out; had to use
my ex-Senatorial and World Court leverage to get a seat
amidst all the jovial holiday travelers.
I arrived in Quito half an hour later. Getting through
customs with my one hastily packed travel bag took
longer than the flight. At least Boston and Quito are in
the same time zone; I didn't have to battle jet lag.
"Jill!" Sam smiled when I swept into his office, but
the smile looked artificial to me. “What brings you down
here?"
People say Sam and I look enough alike to be
siblings. Neither Sam nor I believe it. He's short, getting
pudgy, keeps his rusty red hair cropped short. Shifty eyes,
if you ask me. Mine are a steady brown. I'm just about his
height, and the shape of my face is sort of round, more or
less like his. We both have a sprinkle of freckles across
our noses. But there all resemblance—physical and
otherwise—definitely ends.
"You know damned well what brings me down
here," I snapped, tossing my travel bag on one chair and
plopping myself in the other, right in front of his desk.
Sam had gotten to his feet and started around the
desk, but one look at the blood in my eye and he
retreated back to his own swivel chair. He had built a
kind of platform behind the desk to make himself seem
 
taller than he really was.
He put on his innocent little boy face. "Honest, Jill,
I haven't the foggiest idea of why you're here. Christmas
vacation?''
"Don't be absurd."
"You didn't bring a justice of the peace with you, did
you?"
I had to laugh. Every time I asked myself why in the
ever-loving blue-eyed world I wanted to marry Sam
Gunn, the answer always came down to that. Sam made
me laugh. After a life of grueling work as an astronaut
and then the tensions and power trips of Washington
politics, Sam was the one man in the world who could
make me see the funny side of everything. Even when he
was driving me to distraction, we both had grins on our
faces.
"I should have brought a shotgun," I said, trying to
get serious.
"You wouldn't do that," he said, with that impish
grin of his. Then he added a worried, “Would you?''
“Where did you get the bright idea of suing the
Vatican?"
"Oh, that!" Sam visibly relaxed, eased back in his
chair and swiveled around from side to side a little.
"Yes, that," I snapped. "What kind of a brain-dead
nincompoop idea is that?"
 
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