10 Grammar Mistakes That Make You look Stupid.pdf
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10 Grammar Mistakes That Make You Look Stupid
Version 1.0
May 23, 2005
These days, we tend to communicate via the keyboard as much as we do verbally. Often, we're in a hurry, quickly dashing
off e-mails with typos, grammatical shortcuts (I'm being kind here), and that breezy, e.e. cummings, no-caps look. It's
expected. It's no big deal. But other times, we try to invest a little care, avoiding mistakes so that there's no confusion
about what we're saying and so that we look professional and reasonably bright.
In general, we can slip up in a verbal conversation and get away with it. A colleague may be thinking,
Did she just say
"irregardless"?
, but the words flow on, and our worst transgressions are carried away and with luck, forgotten.
That's not the case with written communications. When we commit a grammatical crime in e-mails, discussion posts,
reports, memos, and other professional documents, there's no going back. We've just officially gone on record as being
careless or clueless. And here's the worst thing. It's not necessary to be an editor or a language whiz or a spelling bee
triathlete to spot such mistakes. They have a way of doing a little wiggle dance on the screen and then reaching out to
grab the reader by the throat.
So here we are in the era of Word's red-underline "wrong spelling, dumb ass" feature and Outlook's Always Check
Spelling Before Sending option, and still the mistakes proliferate. Catching typos is easy (although not everyone does it).
It's the other stuff -- correctly spelled but incorrectly wielded -- that sneaks through and makes us look stupid. Here's a
quick review of some of the big ones.
1.
Loose
for
lose
No:
I always
loose
the product key.
Yes:
I always
lose
the product key.
2.
It's
for
its
(or god forbid,
its'
)
No:
Download the HTA, along with
it's
readme file.
Yes:
Download the HTA, along with
its
readme file.
No:
The laptop is overheating and
its
making that funny noise again.
Yes:
The laptop is overheating and
it's
making that funny noise again.
3.
They're
for
their
for
there
No:
The managers are in
they're
weekly planning meeting.
Yes:
The managers are in
their
weekly planning meeting.
No:
The techs have to check
there
cell phones at the door, and
their
not happy about it.
Yes:
The techs have to check
their
cell phones at the door, and
they're
not happy about it.
4.
i.e.
for
e.g.
No:
Use an anti-spyware program (
i.e.,
AdAware).
Yes:
Use an anti-spyware program (
e.g.,
AdAware).
Note:
The term
i.e.
means "that is";
e.g.
means "for example." And a comma follows both of them.
Page 1
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10 Grammar Mistakes That Make You Look Stupid
5.
Effect
for
affect
No:
The outage shouldn't
effect
any users during work hours.
Yes:
The outage shouldn't
affect
any users during work hours.
Yes:
The outage shouldn't have any
effect
on users.
Yes:
We will
effect
several changes during the downtime.
Note:
Impact
is not a verb. Purists, at least, beg you to use
affect
instead:
No:
The outage shouldn't
impact
any users during work hours.
Yes:
The outage shouldn't
affect
any users during work hours.
Yes:
The outage should have no
impact
on users during work hours.
6.
You're
for
your
No:
Remember to defrag
you're
machine on a regular basis.
Yes:
Remember to defrag
your
machine on a regular basis.
No:
Your
right about the changes.
Yes:
You're
right about the changes.
7.
Different than
for
different from
No:
This setup is
different
than
the one at the main office.
Yes:
This setup is
different
from
the one at the main office.
Yes:
This setup is
better
than
the one at the main office.
8.
Lay
for
lie
No:
I got dizzy and had to
lay
down.
Yes:
I got dizzy and had to
lie
down.
Yes:
Just
lay
those books over there.
9.
Then
for
than
No:
The accounting department had more problems
then
we did.
Yes:
The accounting department had more problems
than
we did.
Note:
Here's a sub-peeve. When a sentence construction begins with
If
, you don't need a
then
.
Then
is implicit, so it's
superfluous and wordy:
No:
If you can't get Windows to boot,
then
you'll
need to call Ted.
Yes:
If you can't get Windows to boot,
you'll
need to call Ted.
10.
Could of
,
would of
for
could have
,
would have
No:
I
could of
installed that app by mistake.
Page 2
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10 Grammar Mistakes That Make You Look Stupid
Yes:
I
could have
installed that app by mistake.
No:
I
would of
sent you a meeting notice, but you were out of town.
Yes:
I
would have
sent you a meeting notice, but you were out of town.
Bonus peeve
I'll just throw one more thing out here: My current burning pet peeve. At some point, who knows when, it became common
practice to say that something is "hit and miss." Nuh-UH. It can't be both, right? It either hits or it misses… "Hit OR miss."
Granted, it's a small thing, a Boolean-obsessive sort of thing. But it's nonetheless vexing because it's so illogical. Okay,
that's mine. If you've got a peeve of your own, share it in the discussion (or post a comment and tell me to get over it).
By Jodi Gilbert
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