Week 18.pdf

WEEK EIGHTEEN

Welcome to Week Eighteen of the Jim Rohn One-Year Success Plan. We hope you are

having a great week and are ready for this week's journey.

This week we begin our 5th Pillar - Relationships, which is obviously one of the most

vital, yet complex areas of human life.

For me, this is an especially interesting Pillar/Month because, although I understand and

appreciate the value and importance of our relationships, it is an area that I have to work

on. I think it is related to being a driven, task-oriented entrepreneur, or at least so I'm told.

:-) Being a dad and husband is not difficult (it is one of the most important parts of my

life). The rewards are obvious, and caring for and providing for my family is part of what

drives me. But outside the home is more of a stretch for me. I'm sharing this, because I

believe with each month we are all challenged more in certain areas than others.

Currently, a large portion of my work now involves large amounts of time on the

computer and doing email. At different times throughout the day I have reminders pop up

on my computer and a good 60% are related to the topic of relationships. The amazing

thing is that most of the changes/skills/habits/thoughts/beliefs etc., that I'm being

encouraged and reminded of, fall under the "free" and "easy" category that we have been

touching on the past several weeks and that Jim has always taught.

How free and easy is it to:

Smile at others?

Listen better?

Be friendly?

Be encouraging?

Not judge?

Speaking of not judging, a good friend and strategic coach I know, Jim Sharp, uses as a

rule, to stay as neutral as possible when it comes to relating to others, especially when

communicating. He says to never make it personal or take it personally, which is solid

advice for achieving good, clear communication. Like Jim says, "Attack the problem, not

the person." Obviously, as with everything, there can be exceptions. But by following this

rule you can eliminate much of the negativity that can be created in relationships, which

often starts over very trivial comments or events.

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For many of you, the "free" and "easy" list above may either come easily or you have

already mastered it. But for the rest of us, we will continue to try and make this area of

our lives a much needed priority and place to improve.

Jim and Chris have a powerful month lined up for you and will be covering these four

parts of relationships.

1. Basics of Healthy Relationships

2. Family and Spousal Relationships

3. Friendships

4. Business Relationships

Let's embrace the process of change and improvement in our relationships. The results

are immediate in many instances and the long-term fruit is inevitable.

Enjoy the Journey!

Kyle

“In life you can never be too kind or too fair; everyone you meet is carrying a heavy load.

When you go through your day expressing kindness and courtesy to all you meet, you

leave behind a feeling of warmth and good cheer, and you help alleviate the burdens

everyone is struggling with.”

-- Brian Tracy

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RELATIONSHIPS

Jim Rohn's Fifth Pillar of Success: Relationships, Part One -

Basics of Healthy Relationships

I've come to the realization that everything we do is based on relationships. Relationships

make the world go around. We buy out of relationships, wars are fought over broken

relationships, we have children because of relationships - every single thing that takes

place on this planet is an extension of and is driven by relationships. Our relationships

can allow us to experience the peaks of ecstasy and the low valleys of agony. They have

the greatest potential to give us joy and cause us to grow and become more if we so

choose.

This month we will explore the secrets of successful relationships, and we will seek to

understand what ingredients make healthy relationships in our lives. Because ultimately,

one person caring about another represents life's greatest value. We will look at four main

areas:

1. Basics of Healthy Relationships. There are certain fundamentals that, if mastered,

will take you far down the road of healthy relationships. The key to understanding

relationships is that relationships involve people. And while every person is different,

there are general principles that make most people tick. If we understand these basics or

fundamentals, and operate accordingly, we can make our bad relationships good and our

good relationships great. We will cover these basics later in this edition.

2. Family and Spousal Relationships. The primary relationships that most people have

are with their family. Yes, that wonderful enigma we call family. Those deep and

meaningful relationships that can bring the highlights - and the lowlights - of life. That

group of people, many of whom we didn't even get to choose, who will walk through this

life with us. Your family relationships must be cultivated like a garden. Time, effort and

imagination must be summoned constantly to keep any relationship growing and

flourishing. We will discuss how to have great family and spousal relationships in next

week's edition.

3. Friendships . Second to family, friends are the most important relationships we have.

Friendships are unique because they are the relationships we have that are almost entirely

voluntary. You don't get to choose your parents or your siblings, but you do get to choose

your friends. And so many times we find that these relationships can provide matchless

dynamics not found in our other relationships. These especially can, in their own special

way, enhance our other relationships. This makes the relationship unique, and we will

take a deeper look into successful friendships in two weeks.

4. Business Relationships. Many people do not understand how powerful relationships

are in business. You've heard me say it before, but you cannot succeed by yourself. It is

hard to find a rich hermit. So many times we underestimate this unique dynamic that has

the potential to take us to new levels in our businesses. We may understand that family

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and friends are about relationships, but mistakenly think that "business is business". The

fact is that even in business, relationships rule. Think for a moment about two sales

people, one of whom is a friend and one of whom you have never met before. When it

comes right down to it, you are most likely to buy from the one you know. That is the

foundation of relationships. In three weeks, we will look at how to have great business

relationships.

The Basics of Healthy Relationships.

Nothing can bring more joy to life than beautifully fulfilling relationships. The depth of

meaning, understanding and appreciation that these kinds of relationships bring is almost

unfathomable. And, of course, as many people find out, nothing can bring so much pain

as a broken relationship with someone dear to you.

Yes, relationships make the world go 'round'. For better or for worse. But the exciting

thing is that we can do much to increase our chances of having terrific relationships--

relationships that are fulfilling and exciting, rich with meaning, joy and love. There are

basics that govern most human relationships and these basics are what I want to cover

below. So, here is my list of the eight essentials that I believe make up the basics of

healthy relationships.

1. Love. Now, this all depends on your definition of love. Most people think that love is a

feeling, but I would strongly debate that point. Actually, the concept of "like" is really

about feelings. When you say you like someone, you are talking about how you feel. But

when you say that you love someone, you are not necessarily talking about how you feel

about them. Love is much deeper than a feeling. Love is a commitment we make to

people to always treat that person right and honorably. Yes, for those we become

especially close to, we will have feelings of love, but I believe it is time for us to re-

examine what we mean by love. We must expand our definition of what love means by

including the commitment aspect of love. For healthy relationships, we must love

everyone. We may not like them based on how we feel about them, but we should love

them based on our definition of love above which in turn determines how we should act

towards them, that is, treat them right and honorably. This is the basis of all healthy

relationships.

2. Serving Heart. My good friend Zig Ziglar says frequently

that "you can have everything you want in life if you help

enough other people get what they want out of life." The

concept he is talking about is having a heart and life that is

focused on serving other people. The Bible puts it this way:

consider others' interests as more important than your own.

This is also fundamental to healthy relationships.

3. Honest Communication. In any good relationship you

will find open and honest communication. Communication is

so important because it is the vehicle that allows us to

verbalize what is inside us and enables it to connect with another person. Isn't

communication amazing? One person is feeling one thing and through communication,

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